Rochelle M Cunningham

  “If only there could be an invention that bottled up a memory, like scent. And it never faded, and it never got stale. And then, when one wanted it, the bottle could be uncorked, and it would be like living the moment all over again.” ―  Daphne du Maurier,  Rebecca I recently watched the most recent rendition of Rebecca on Netflix; based on a novel written in the 1930s by Daphne du Maurier.  I remember watching the original motion picture that came out in 1940 and being mesmerized by the mystery and the romance.  Of course, as a young girl the notion of 'Love' and 'Romance' were definitely romanticized by my imagination through the books and movies that I was influenced by.  Now, as an almost middle-aged woman who has had a monogamous relationship with a single person for over two decades now and two children,  the idea of 'Love' and 'Romance' has morphed and evolved into something beautiful a less "mysterious".  As I watched the new renditio...

I am a procrastinator ... but I am realizing that my procrastination is not pure laziness (a misconception that the world holds on most procrastinator) but I struggle with my ADHD, control issues and the notion of perfection. It is because of these things that I find myself struggling inwardly... a battle of my mind that halts productivity because of the sheer idea that I shouldn't do the thing that I want to because: a) I'm not good at it (yet) b) I don't know enough about ______ (yet) c) I don't have enough time..."I should do blank, blank and blank first...then I will have enough time". d) I've failed too many times to even try anymore of it . Well, I can tell you that this mindset is something that I have struggled with for my entire adult life...and a lot of my childhood. I can not pinpoint the age or time that I realized that I was doing these things, but I know that it has been a running theme for most of my life. Knowing this, I also realize that f...

Mornings are getting harder for me. Maybe it's the fact that it's fall and the mornings are getting darker earlier, or that we are almost in month nine of the pandemic...but sleep is something that by the end of the day is not only welcomed but is coveted when the alarm clock that I set the night before goes off. Thankfully I am a creature of some sorts of habits, and one of them is the fact that I cherish a bit of 'alone' time in the morning before my kids awake and the hustle and bustle of the day start to ensue on my thoughts and reflections. The wee morning hours are the ones that I can call 'my own', as the rest of the day is dedicated to 'us' and 'them' depending on the circumstances. I am interested in seeing what my reality will look like in the next week (when the presidential election will finally unfold for us who will be the leader of our country), the next month (as we experience holidays still distancing and different from what we h...

When I was a really young child I thought that everyone had experiences like me, had a childhood like mine, a family like mine and that the world was a familiar place. As I got older I realized how different everyone is, how everyone has different experiences and circumstances and that the world was vast and dangerous. I realized that not everyone thinks like me or acts like me (nor did they appreciate the way that I acted or reacted some of the time).  I was more and more a 'black sheep' the older I got.  Because of my awkwardness and shame of such, I started to live a life that was not reflective of who I was on the inside. I didn't like who I was or what my life/family circumstances were, so I acted more on false-confidence and a level pride that made up a world that I projected around me. I made sure that I was seen as confident, funny and the 'good kinda different'. In this process I would get lost in the persona that I was desperately trying to project into th...

I don't know about you, but I have had the worse committee of voices in my head for far too long. I am not alone...I have heard that I am not the only one who has 'hired' these awful 'people' to live as directors and dictators in the back of my mind.  These are the voices that not only tell us the stuff like ' you aren't good enough' and ' you're never going to accomplish much, so why try?' ...they are much worse. Just to clarify, these "voices" aren't audible, but they are definitely real and common. Sometimes they are the voices that begin with a parent, or an adult of our childhood; many of which are narcissistic and cruel, or maybe they are listening to the same voices and project them onto the young around them. No matter what the situation might be, these 'voices' are the ones that we carry with us into adulthood. They are the ones that we 'hire' to help us with choices that decisions that might cause us t...

To Tube or Not To Tube... A question that has been eating at me for a really long time. I think that many of us have been wondering if living a life on the YouTube screen is one that we would want.  I mean, "Everyone is doing it! Right?". Well, no...not everyone is doing it...but a lot are. And though a lot are, not everyone should. I, myself, love watching things that are engaging and inspiring, educational and further my knowledge. I have spent countless hours watching videos on YouTube and other resources that have helped me fix my sewing machine, taught me a painting skill, helped me with my daughters math homework, and even helped me numb out my brain with silly and funny pet videos after a busy day. There is no denying that YouTubers have fulfilled the lives of many people. I alway have wanted to live a life that was one that could engage others, inspire others, educate others and help others further their knowledge for a wonderful and fruitful future. But...